"I don't want the illusion of normality, Charles. I want...I want..." She can't tell him what she wants. It's there, right there, if he chooses to look, but she knows he won't look. He promised her a long time ago that he wouldn't do that to her. Maybe, at first, it was a blessing. She didn't want him seeing inside and seeing what she felt for him. But the longer she feels this way, the harder it is to consider doing something about it.
"It just hurts to know that you can bring home anyone you want. Any of the girls you flirt with talking about their 'groovy mutations'. You can bring them home and not have to worry about whether they know your secret. So maybe you know their drink order. So maybe you know that one thing that'll make even the hardest girl blush. It's not like they'll figure it out. And I can't ever have that. I can't brush a little too close to the edge, no. I go tumbling over the side in a barrell. And I'm..."
She lowers her eyes and shakes her head. She can't bring herself to say it. She can't bring herself to say that she wants him. That she's jealous that he can have whatever he wants and she can't have the one thing that she wants. Her lips smile at him, but her eyes are bleak. "Never mind. Let's just go home. That's the only place for me, isn't it?"
no subject
Date: 2011-09-11 11:09 pm (UTC)"It just hurts to know that you can bring home anyone you want. Any of the girls you flirt with talking about their 'groovy mutations'. You can bring them home and not have to worry about whether they know your secret. So maybe you know their drink order. So maybe you know that one thing that'll make even the hardest girl blush. It's not like they'll figure it out. And I can't ever have that. I can't brush a little too close to the edge, no. I go tumbling over the side in a barrell. And I'm..."
She lowers her eyes and shakes her head. She can't bring herself to say it. She can't bring herself to say that she wants him. That she's jealous that he can have whatever he wants and she can't have the one thing that she wants. Her lips smile at him, but her eyes are bleak. "Never mind. Let's just go home. That's the only place for me, isn't it?"